Gabrielle's Wings

Gabrielle's Wings

Dear Friends,

This is for those of you who knew and loved Gabrielle, and it is also to share with you my own journey with this great being.

I just completed a huge passage in my own life. Gabrielle, my archangel and friend of 20 years died Sat night. It was fully expected. She had been having challenges with her breathing for a couple of years, and finally they discovered it was lymphoma. At 75, she elected not to do chemo, but realized it was her time to go. Gabrielle, for those that may not know her, took care of me in many ways, one of the most important being the keeper of the sacred financial books and that of the Divine Feminine-Awakened Masculine Institute as well. She also interacted with the students around tuition and housing and all that stuff that takes time and patience. She helped set up our on-line store, and sent the products to all those who ordered them. She could answer almost any question, or find the answer. She did everything with excellence, and our financial records always came out to the penny.

It was a bittersweet few months of being with her, as she slowly became weaker and weaker, but during that time we shared so many memories and so much love. I brought her fresh coconut water from the coconuts on our land that Caroline had planted. It was one of the few things she really enjoyed. I also brought her lilikoi tapioca made with coconut milk that she also loved.

We traced our time since she we had known each other, when she came to me for counseling after being in a couple of car accidents. At that time, she was wrapped very tightly from holding in a great deal of pain and anger for many years. During the time I counseled her, and then beyond that as we evolved into a friendship, I watched her claim her life. I watched her grow, along with her hair, from a woman that almost looked like a man, (she had extremely short hair and wore only jeans and t-shirts), into a beautiful woman with long, black, thick, curly hair. She had a milky pink complexion and, in her metamorphosis, she began to dress in long dresses, with sparkly combs and a bindi. She began to look like the pictures of Radha I had seen; Krishna's consort.

Gabrielle taught me things about living life. At 70 she took up the ukulele and hula. She looked for ways to help those around her. She wanted everything to be perfect, which caused her great distress at times, since life is everything, including 'not perfect'. But she would continue on, even after painful experiences, determined to get over it and do what she could for those she loved.

To name all the things that Gabrielle did for me would take a long time, and you may not want to read such a lengthy letter. Just know she went above and beyond in her care of me, and then Tomas and me and our business, and then DFAMI. In many ways she was like a mother or older sister, but archangel sums it up.

What was beyond wonderful, was that, in the few months after she decided to go consciously into her dying process, she let go of all of the remaining upsets she had with everyone and came to complete peace. Her only regret, which we shared, was that she could not do it sooner, but the fact is, that she could not have. And that she did finally did find this peace was monumental. We wept many happy tears over this fact, and promised one another that when we meet in our next life, we will start from this new elevation. Next time, we promised, we'll have a lot more fun together.

I was awakened Sunday morning by the call that Gabrielle had died peacefully at 11 pm Sat night. Sandrina, her daughter had been with her solidly for days, barely leaving the room, except for times when others, like myself, would visit. I had been there for an hour or so Saturday. Gabrielle was in that state that let us know she would be leaving very soon. Just before 11, Sandrina hurried downstairs to get some juice. She came back up and Gabrielle had just slipped away. As Sandrina said, Gabrielle was probably waiting for the moment when no one was looking to make her exit.

Sunday was a beautiful day. We had been in a rainy, windy pattern, which I thought would continue for some time. But Sunday was gorgeous. The sun was out and the clouds were morphing from one amazing shape to another. Lots of angels and Krishna-like headdresses. So the angels and Krisha himself came to collect her. It was all there in the clouds that day. Later, I heard from Amrita, that a huge, very bright rainbow was right over Gabrielle's house, as she drove there for the gathering.

I had the honor of helping prepare her body Sunday morning, along with 4 other angel friends who also loved her. It was a real initiation. We lovingly bathed her, rubbed scented oil on her body, and anointed her chakras. We dressed her in a beautiful long dress with a lovely lace shawl and put a haku lei and puakinikini flowers in her hair, since she loved to dance hula and puakinikini was her favorite flower. We sprinkled rose petals and other flowers from her yard around her body. We put on the music she had asked to listen to as she was making her exit. It was a compilation of Hallelujah, Kyrie, Hara Hara and Om Namah Shivaya by Robert Gass. Then we cleaned her room and created altars everywhere with candles, flowers, crystals and pictures of angels. She will lay in state for three days, while her friends come and pay their final respects.

I came home to get ready to go back for the memorial we were going to have. My emotions were all over the place, waves of feelings, my own personal sadness of missing this great friend, gratitude for all I had with her, thankfulness that her passing had been so peaceful. I was about to take my dog, Pono, for a walk when this little voice came in telling me to take a swim. I didn't have much time, but I grabbed my towel and walked down to Hale Akua and jumped in their salt-water swimming pool and did 20 laps. I swam on my back a lot, and watched legions of angel clouds sweep by. Gabrielle knew how much I loved to swim. I was sure that was her voice urging me to do what was most healing for me. She made sure I took care of myself that day. That is just like her!

Sunday afternoon Tomas, Amrita and I came together with other of her friends. Bodhi, who was presiding over the gathering with Leila, his wife, reminded us that we are all going to end up where Gabrielle is some day, and celebrated that it was in her own bed with a beautiful view of meadows and pastures, and surrounded by the love of her daughter and all her friends. Thanks to hospice, she was pain free and well cared for up until the end. He added, "May we all be so fortunate."

I was deeply touched to see how a community of loving friends can care for one who is dying with such love and devotion. I pray that everyone has a community of conscious souls, willing to watch over those who are getting ready to make their journey to the other side, so it can be as ease-full and peace-full as possible.



Having seen now a few of my friends make their end play, I see how differently we each choose to exit. Bodhi, who has seen more than I, says, that everyone he's been with, in their last days, there are two things people have to come to terms with. One is coming to peace with anyone you've not been at peace with. The other is feeling that you have lived your life fully. He suggests you do this before you get to this place in your life. Do what you love, now. And find peace with everyone, in person or in your heart.

Gabrielle made her peace. She also came to see that she had lived a wonderful life. For this I am eternally thankful.



Eternal Blessings and Love, Joan